Hiya could I get a private post please?
Looking for some advice
I’m in my early 20s have been with my partner 6 years we have 1 child and another on the way . Shortly after my first child was born I found out that my partner had cheated with his ex girlfriend after finding it out obviously I took it very bag packed a bag and left and obviously still let him see the child as i wouldn’t let it effect him. After a while and a lot of grafting from him we sat down and came to the decision to get back together and give it a go as I know it’s no excuse but it happened before the baby and after the baby was born and I found out we had been closer then ever so it just felt very hard to let go of. Anyway he had no problem blocking her off his phone and knew my feelings towards her ( me and her never got on even before this cheating incident) which I think is why I took it so bad it was like the one person I really disliked for different reasons when we were younger .. I was convinced I was happy not to hear about her or talk about her and go on about our lives this was 2022. Fast forward to now and since being pregnant again I’ve found myself thinking over and over about the situation I think because more so I was so scared of now having 2 kids and feeling the way I felt after having my first again because it was very very hard on my mental health . I spoke to him a few months back and told him this pregnancy was different my mental health wasn’t good and I found myself thinking about things that I thought I let go of and he reassured me and we didn’t really speak about it since.
Unfortunately a relative of this ex died and my partner took that as an excuse to unblock her and text her to see how she was doing. Normally I’d think that it’s a decent thing to do but knowing my feelings towards her after everything that happened I just feel so embarrassed that he’d do that to me. I suppose I’m more so looking for advice from people that can look at the situation with fresh eyes as some days I think I’m over reacting and some days I just cry constantly thinking ok this is the first time he’s had some sort of excuse to text her and he’s went and unblocked her to text her I just feel like this was maybe testing the waters to see if she’d reply? Which she did within 30 seconds and by complete flook I seen it as he had used my phone to message someone about something he was buying and left it logged in. I know I’m more sensitive now that I’m pregnant but I just feel it was so unnecessary to go out of his way to text someone he was with for a few months 8 years ago and had already cheated on me with.
Can someone please tell me if I’m over thinking this and should just let it go or if how I’m feeling is valid because my head hasn’t been right since it happened.
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