can I have a private post please. Anyone just feel like theyre with each other for the kids? You know you love them, and vice versa. 4 kids age 10 downwards. is it normal after 14 years together to go down to sex like once a month? He just isn’t interested in it, atall. Say we haven’t got time ect. Last had sex 5 weeks ago. Don’t really know why im messaging this. Iv tried communicating but the hardly ever sex thing I just get that I pester him about it and we don’t get time. is that really normal?
Source
My husband and I were down to once a year, he was mentally depressed after quitting a stressful work situation. That went on for 5 years, then nothing for 8 years. He had a brain tumor and died.
Gonna say this as it’s absolutely true you both are comfortable and it’s become ground hog day and all about the kids…..
I ve got 4 been married 10 years together 15 and we been through this on and off and best tbinf to do is talk, no phones some nights when kids are asleep, watch a film together sitting next to each other, plan different date nights can do around the kids, if can have a night without the kids even better if cant csn work around it
You both need to go back to before kids in a way and re light the flame 🔥
he might be having issues or depression, without being rude is he still finding time to pleasure himself or watching porn? if the answer is yes then it’s either he just doesn’t want to have to please you when he is sorting himself out he became lazy and selfish to his own needs. You need to sit him down and talk properly because if it’s none of the above and he hasn’t gone off you or getting sex elsewhere it’s not normal he can’t expect you to live in a sexless relationship when you obviously want that intimacy. Arrange a baby sitter do date nights try to rekindle who you were as a couple before the children.
Could he be anxious about you having more children. Perhaps he’s worried about this and about how much the cost of living is. Try and arrange a date night now and then ask a relation to baby sit. Having four young children around could also be stopping him feeling relaxed
I have 4 kids ages 17,11,10 and 7 I’m going through preimanopause and my sex drive isn’t like what it use to be and I don’t want to be touch I’m tired and my hubby works 24/7 finding that balance is hard, we been together for 20 years we still love each other.😊😊
Is he on or started any medication that could cause this issue? Change in his behaviour etc?
Me and my partner have been together 6 half years, 3 kids!! I get very tired quickly and my partner understands so we have sex whenever we both feel like we want it could be months or even weeks without it!! And we both love each other ☺️ hope that helps x
Perfectly normal unfortunately you just don’t have the time or energy as you once did.
Talk to him about it in a non confrontational way and explain you miss the sex but you miss him too x
No it isn’t normal.
We have 2 kids, 18 year old has disabilities, doesn’t sleep much, no childcare, youngest is almost 16, we still enjoy spending time together and have a healthy sex life a lot more than once a month. Been together over 20 years. We make time for each other – a relationship is a two way thing and takes both of you to make it work and enjoyable.
10 and younger should have a good bedtime routine so you get time together in an evening when the kids have gone to bed.