Can I have a private post please?
Hey everyone. I don’t even know how or what to write here. I’ve 3 kids already (12, 10 and 6) and just found out I am pregnant with baby number 4. I don’t know what to do. I’ve been crying with the guilt and stress everyday since finding out. We didn’t want anymore kids and I am currently on contraception.
We are leaning more towards a termination for health reasons and financial. I had eclampsia with all 3 children whom all resulted in premature emergency c sections. Also financial because even though we both work full time – we still seem to be pay check to pay check. Although I know that termination is the right decision I still have the guilt, the what ifs and the what could bes.
I have expressed these feelings to my husband and although he has stated he will support me with what I choose, he has said over and over that there is no positives to continuing the pregnancy. That is isn’t fair on our older 3 children, it would cripple us financially and also the fact another pregnancy could potentially threaten my life. Although I agree, I can’t help but worry id regret my decision later down the line. I feel like I shouldn’t be allowed to grieve because its a choice I’m making. I honestly do not know what to do 💔
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I think and believe you can only make this decision no one else can 🥰 don’t think of the what ifs because you have to think right now what’s best for you hunni sending love and prayers your way 🥰🥰
You are allowed to grieve the what if’s. Xxx
You can grieve however you please, decison made by you or not. Don’t let the guilt override you, have a good think on it yourself, then speak to your partner, you need to do whatever is right for yourself and your family. Good luck xx
Don’t let guilt get in the way of a practical decision. Imo not wanting to abort isn’t a good enough reason to carry on with the pregnancy.
This is how I would feel if I got pregnant again. My heart would want the baby with everything. But it wouldn’t be the right thing to do for so many reasons.
The way I think about it is…yes I would love another baby. But could my household survive another PERSON. Theyre two entirely different things.
If you decide to terminate you are still allowed to grieve what could of been. Dont let anybody tell you any different.
I had a termination in 2020 because of mental health money and marriage problems, I had three children at that time. It was a difficult decision to make, I still grieved that baby. You can grief you are allowed too. I do regret the decision to terminate, but I had to stand by my decision.
Please don’t worry about how you may feel it you have a termination, if the timing isn’t right and you know deep down it’s the best decision for you and your children, you won’t feel guilty xxxx
Firstly you ARE allowed to grieve even if it’s a choice you’ve made. It’s a life after all. Secondly I was in exactly the same situation as you a few years back and I decided to terminate for your exact reasons. Although I still grieve what is gone I do not regret my decision as I know I’m in the best place for myself and my family. Don’t let the guilt win but ultimately it’s your decision so do what you think is best for you and yours