Hi can i get a private post please.
Me and my babies father have our first mediation meeting tomorrow with both of us.
The whole reason this was sorted is because i said its in bubbas best interest to not go on a 3 day trip with him, 4 hours there, 4 hours back, he had a broken hand and text the weekend befor saying i might need to pick her up as he was struggling with his hand, he was takin the car back from me which was meant to be shared and i traded my car in for and i had not sorted one out by then so worried i couldn’t get to her if need be, plus the car he took back when you turned it the front wheel would ping the bumper where wheels were too big,, and he would let her eat crisps in the back on her own (she was 9 and a half months) he told me once on the motor way to take her out the car seat and give her a bottle when she cried while he carried on driving.. there was just allot of gut feelin to not want her to go.
So i said its in her best interest not to go, ill have her that weekend and he can see her any other time,, his response was well then for bubbas best interest ill be takin this further, a couple hours later i received a mediation email to book,, and he responded to an email stating if i diddnt book he would like the c100 form to sprt with his solicitor.
Since this he has cancelled a weekend with her to work on a car however i told him i sorted a car and he come that weekend to pick his car up,, diddnt bother checking in on bubba,, he has asked for 1 update in over a month,, although he has had her most weekends, but during the week wont ask how shes doing.
He was 4 hours late to pick her up one day, he said 4pm, then 6, then 7 and then 8,, turned up at 8 20, he said this was because a family meal had been a disater and made him run late. The following day my grandad was rushed to hospital due to a seizure. I asked him to drop her back at 7pm rather than 5pm, he said he wouldnt because it is starting to effect her routine and she needs stability. I said if you give her dinner at 5 and drop her back she will be back by 7, in time for her bath and then bed. He refused and said it would make him not get back to his until late and he had work the next day, he said he would be happy to keep her the night and drop her back in the morning, which he would have had to wake her up and drop her off by 7am. I said thats effecting her routine tho more than if he was to have dropped her back a couple hours later that afternoon.
He was about an hour late this weekend to pick her up as he had to pick up his sister from hospital and drop her home(which i completley understand this one) but then that sunday dropping her home he said he is takin her to see his dads but ‘depending how the vibe is she might be home abit earlier’
I had made arrangments to help with my grandad at his care home and aimed to be left by 3 30 from there and home by 4 in time for her return,, i asked him to please stick to the time he had said because i was busy and he said bubba is a priority and to make sure im home when she is,, i said i know she is very much my priority but my grandad whos 95, kidney failure, 3 tumors on his brain, possible skin cancer, diabetic, dementia is in a home for end of life care and im trying to help my mum with alot of whats going on with him.
I work 3 days a week,, my mum has bubba for those 3 days i work, he has told me hes claimed mental health and gone off work sick and cant afford to have her at the weekends as much as he has been,, he said he wanted to pick her up during the week while hes had time off but his dr advised him to take the time for himself.
I take sertraline, i suffer from anxiety and depression. I lice below his sister who he dosent talk to and none of his family are talkin to as she attacked me a few weeks back for no reason other than me sayin she coulnt take our baby on a trip to the isle of white for the weekend. She drinks alot, does drugs and argues alot with her partner and her 12 year old daughter. I was not comfortable allowing this. Everyone including her family said i was well within my rights not to be comfortable to let her go with her and she was completley out of order to put her hands on me.
So all of this plus a few details missed out because its already very long winded.. but thats the main issues ive had and thing thing thats bugging me and confusing me the most is when he is tellin me i need to make our daughter my priority and i really feel like i am,, but he comes and goes as he pleases with her, everything seems to be on his schedule as apposed to our babies schedule, i made sure i was home incase he bought her back early and he ended up bringing her back late by about 45 minutes anyways so i had to cancel helping out with my grandad and i could have helped in the end. Im just annoyed hes set up mediation but not stickin to his own word like im trying my best to do
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